A Dark Timeline Companion

The first thing to do is to make an account. You can call it whatever you like. The safest thing to do is to give it a name that can't ever be connected to your main account. If your main account is "DominiqueLi", call your alt "smackalope&#95huntress". If your main is "purplefae", call your alt "seneschuality". No anagrams, no jokes about your main handle, no word games. This way, nobody will ever guess your main from your alt's handle. You will be [[safe|safety]]. (link:"However...")[== The first thing you'll notice on the dark timeline is that nobody does this. DominiqueLi's alt is called (cycling-link:"SubiniqueWhee", "DomAtNight","ALittleMoreLiway"). purplefae's alt is called (cycling-link: "@purplefaesAlt", "purplebae", "eafelprup"). This is because people feel [[safe|safety]] enough with the other steps they take for safety. Good. I recommend you take the safest route. I want you to name your account so when you (link-reveal:"wake up at 5am")[== (link-reveal:"and remember you took an edible")[== (link-reveal:"and tweeted how you'd like your crush to sit on you and drag $possessivePronoun redacted over your redacted until you redact all over,")[== you can at least take comfort in knowing that nobody can link that account to the one where you organise a weekly rationalist mini-golf mixer. (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:4s)[==Except, of course, all of your [[mutuals]], who are laughing their ass off about it.

# How to have a Dark Alt ## or, A Dark Timeline Companion. by bashu [[✨ click for the tldr ✨|tldr]] 👉 [[about this guide]] ▓ [[why is the timeline dark?]] 🌌 [[why make a dark alt?]] 📇 [[naming]] 🥽 [[safety]] ☺️ [[content]] 🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 [[mutuals]] 💌 [[reply etiquette]] 📝 [[DM templates]] 🔚 [[The End]]

# Dark mutuals Being mutuals on dark alt is serious. it's like a micro marriage. The implication is that you will host them on your couch whenever they're in town, support them through crises, hold their dick when they piss, etc. (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:6s)[== No, only joking, it's just Twitter. Dark mutuals will affect your experience more than light mutuals, though. Here are some guidelines: [[Who should you let follow you]] [[Who you should follow|who you should follow]] [[How to follow people]]

''tldr'': make a dark alt so you can be weirder. It's (cycling-link:"competitive","collaborative") journalling. (link-replace:"Give me the bullet points")[== 1. [[Have fun|content]] 2. Be [[cringe]]. 3. [[Locked alts only]] 4. [[Make your first post super raw|what to post first]] 5. Post [[cringer/rawer|encouraging each other]] than your mutuals. 6. Don’t [[lurk]] 7. Don’t [[leak|leaks]]; keep private posts private. 8. [[Reply well|reply etiquette]] 9. Be more than a [[reply guy]]. 10. Have very [[few followers|How many followers]] [[The End]]

Q: This is really nonlinear A: Yeah, it's kind of a fun side effect of the format. Q: what's up with the format? A: this is made in Twine, a platform for interactive fiction stories. You should play (link: "Howling Dogs by Porpentine🔗")[(open-url: 'https://xrafstar.monster/games/twine/howlingdogs/')] if you've never seen one before. Q: But this isn't Interactive Fiction! it's a guide to making a kind of twitter account A: That's true, although I've tried to spice it up a little. Q: I'm disappointed that this isn't Interactive Fiction. A: Okay. You are on a [[ship in the middle of the sea]].

# A thought on safety You may post things on dark alt that make you sound (cycling-link:"crazy", "unemployable", "undateable", "antisocial", "criminal", "evil", "ungrateful", "unfathomably cringe"). In short, it could affect your personal, social, professional life. Be safe! (link:"What is the safest thing?")[= The safest thing is to never talk about of this shit. Clam up and stay clam. Zip it. (link:"What is the next safest thing?")[= The next safest thing is to be careful about who sees it. Set out clear boundaries and stick to them, either [[in your bio|bio]], or in a [[DM|DM Template - Follow Request vetting]] when people send you a follow request. Avoid [[leaks]]. (link:"What is safety?")[=Safety refers to two things: practical measures and a feeling. The point of security (the practical measures) is to have security (the feeling). Forcing yourself to be vulnerable when you don't feel safe is counterproductive. (t8n:"blur")+(t8n-delay:16s)[(It can be hard to know if you feel safe. Check in with your body. I always say: you can fake a laugh, you can fake a smile, but you can't fake a relaxed butthole.)]

be content

# Reply Etiquette Respect the intimacy into which you have been invited. If somebody invites you to their bedroom and gets naked in front of you and you say (link-replace:"something uncouth")[''HOLY SHIT IS THAT A BIRTHMARK OR A JAM STAIN''] , they might not invite you back. Likewise if somebody posts something [[petty]], it's uncouth to say “hey, be better than that, that's petty”. They're doing it on alt, venting is sacred. (link-reveal:"It may not be the right time to remind them of their ideals🔗")[(open-url:"https://x.com/strangestloop/status/1822666221810069933?t=7GI1qJ4z-3HswX6mby2dmg&s=19")] That said, some people want you to be just as raw with them in the replies as they are being. So ask them. if you want that to be your norm, put it in [[your bio|bio]]: “If you're here, I want you to be ruthless with me” Just don't forget you asked that. lol.

# Ship in the middle of the sea you have been sailing for days, trudging the salty blue in pursuit of the evil pirate who has [[kidnapped]] your crush. A locket from your crush hangs around your neck, with a little length of $possessivePronoun hair in it. A sword hangs from your belt, also a gift from $objectivePronoun. You no longer wonder if you'd use it; you know now it'll be a challenge not to. (if:$ghost)[ There's a dog in the prow of your boat, looking meditatively out over the waves. ] Far ahead on the horizon, you can see the pirate's stone castle, draped on a hill overlooking a gentle lagoon, on [[its rocky isle|pirate island]]. Off to starboard you can see [[another island|mermaid island]] with an ancient and titanic statue of a mermaid rising above the jungle canopy. This one is oddly shaped.

(if: $epithet is 0)[ (set: $epithet to (prompt: [what do you want us to call you?], (either: 'dumbass', 'dude', 'silly', 'homie', 'anon'), "Don't care", "Confirm")) ] (t8n:"dissolve")[== OK, $epithet. What are your crush's pronouns? (link-reveal-goto: "He/His", "Start")[(set:$possessivePronoun to 'his', $subjectivePronoun to 'he', $objectivePronoun to 'him', $isAre to 'is', $s to "s")] (link-reveal-goto: "She/Her", "Start")[(set:$possessivePronoun to 'her', $subjectivePronoun to 'she', $objectivePronoun to 'her', $isAre to 'is', $s to "s")] (link-reveal-goto: "They/Them", "Start")[(set:$possessivePronoun to 'their', $subjectivePronoun to 'they', $objectivePronoun to 'them', $isAre to 'are', $s to "")] [[I don't want to say.->privacy]] (link-replace:"I don't have a crush.")[ Just pick whatever, it's not really important.]

you value your privacy. that's good however, i don't know who you are. even if i did, telling me your crush's pronouns doesn't really narrow it down. If you are still not comfortable with that amount of disclosure, you might have a hard time having a dark alt. [["It just feels sketchy."->sketchy]]

That's fair. I was being pushy. Tell you what you can do: Put your phone into airplane mode, or turn your Wifi off. That way you can be certain that your data isn't being sent anywhere. This will still work fine. Does that seem too [[paranoid]]?

It's a good idea to be paranoid. This is the internet. (t8n:"fade")+(t8n-delay:4s)[There is almost no good answer for how paranoid you should be.] [[Now,->The Start]]

''On the Nature of Cringe'' All of this is cringe, $epithet. You are (cycling-link:"here", "on the dark timeline", "born", "alive", "cursed", "encouraged", "lucky to be alive at a time when it is a survivable thing") to be (link-reveal: "cringe.")[== Cringe is shorthand for “I don’t feel safe enough to be seen engaging with this”. This can be solved, as a (link-show: "skill issue", ?skillIssue) or an (link-show: "environmental issue", ?envIssue). |skillIssue)[ ''skill issue'': Get stronger. Get more comfortable with being judged. You’ll die alone anyways. Live proud to enjoy what you enjoy.] |envIssue)[== ''Environmental issue'': Get safer. Carve out a place where you can be vulnerable. Make an alt and don’t let anybody follow it. Post the cringiest stuff in there. (link-reveal:'Q: "It’s still cringe even if it’s just me, though.”')[== A: No, $epithet! There’s nobody there to shame you. Either you enjoy what you're saying or you don't. (link-reveal:'Q: “OK, but... Eventually I’m gonna let people follow me.”')[== Then you’d better let the right people follow you, $epithet! (link:"Here's the point")+(t8n:"dissolve")[Having a dark alt is a radical act of self-acceptance via others. (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:3s)[(You can go ahead and tweet that.)] ]

# Why Locked Alts Only? bc that's half the reason [[the timeline is dark|why is the timeline dark?]]

# Lurking the Dark Timeline Lurking is always reading and never interacting (commenting, replying) This is very common on light timeline. It's somewhat worse to do on dark timeline because of the higher vulnerability. Imagine if you invited somebody to watch you masturbate and they simply walked in, looked at you, and then walked away. Alienating! What are they thinking? Who knows? Maybe they hate your junk. At least one friend i have [[deletes followers|deleting followers]] if they follow him on his dark alt and then never interact. This is understandable. your mutuals are pouring out their heart. Pour yours out too. [[Play the game|encouraging each other]]. If you coast on their vulnerability, and never show yours, they won’t get the full benefit and neither will you.

# What to post first ## anteing up after making an account, before you [[invite people to follow you]], take a minute and post something //crazy// raw. something you'd only share w people you trust. Something that you judge yourself for. Post something too raw to post on main. (link-reveal: "But, (and this is important),")[== it must be real. Something spontaneous that rises from within you. Something that, if somebody you trust were to read it, would make you feel closer to them because they now know more of your true heart. (link-reveal: "Why?")[== Because when you start accepting follow requests, you’ll know that they can scroll down and read that. This will be your concrete reminder to let in trusted people only, and keep it a [[high vulnerability space]]. I started by writing a list of animals that I would have sex with. You can do that too. Here are some other [[ideas|post ideas]]:

# How many people to let follow you Way, way, fewer than main. [[Don’t accept every follow request|Who should you let follow you]]. [[Delete followers|deleting followers]] anytime you need to. I have 1000s of followers and 1000~ mutuals on main. That’s **too many people to care about**. Sorry. Dunbar made up some numbers and now i know too many cool people. [[Way she blows, boys | i should call her]]. On my dark alt, I have about 50~ [[followers/following| perfect ratio]], and that’s a lot. Luckily they’ve all proven themselves to be cool. If you only have 1 follower, that’s good. If you have 0 followers, maybe that's fine too. Most dark alts I see are between 10 and 100.

''Who should you let follow you?'' Locked alts. Trusted mutuals. Respectful weirdos. [[Not your crush|altzone]]. [[Not people you vent about on dark alt]]. Let whoever follow you. but (link-replace:"here are some other considerations")[== On Light Timeline, people often say going from 10 followers to 10k followers will change how free you feel. On Dark Timeline, going from 10 to 11 followers can change how free you feel. It depends on the 11th follower. be selective. it's not just [[how many followers|How many followers]], it's whom. key question: do I want this person to read my diary, and would I write more guardedly in it if I knew they were reading? (b4r:"solid","none")+(b4r-colour:white)[(link-reveal:"Q: Why be picky?")[ A: Because this is who you’re inviting to the sauna. This is who you’re inviting to the sex party, to the crywank, the deathbed, the acid drop. If their presence prevents you from relaxing, it puts you on edge, then it’s not worth it. Don’t let people follow you just to be nice. that’s not being nice to them. You’re gonna regret it and resent them. ]] [[Tip: How to see your Follow Requests]] [[((if you're hesitating…))| hesitate ]]

# deleting followers go ahead and delete followers for any reason at any time. It can be nice to send them [[a DM saying "hey, i removed you. no hard feelings"|DM template - follower removal]]. Here are some reasons to delete followers: - They don't post enough - They don’t vulnerablepost [[as much as you do|What if they’re not playing the same game?]] - They don’t interact with your posts - They interacted in a crappy way and made you regret being vulnerable - You want to [[downsize|How many followers]] your dark timeline You can also leave a [[note in your bio|bio]] telling people they can re-request. nobody is [[entitled to follow you|who is entitled to follow you]].

i should call her.

''Ideal ratio on dark alt'' The ideal following:follower ratio for a dark alt is 1:1. Go chase clout on main. There is no point on the dark timeline, you're playing a totally orthogonal game, of openness. You are here to see a mutual pour their heart out onto the cold tile floor, you’re going to pour yours out even more fervently, and then your shared mutual will see you guys doing that and pour THEIR heart out even more fervently. [[Clout cannot buy you this|encouraging each other]].

# Encouraging Each Other <img src="images/haha-yes.png"> People post real because they read real posts. You want it realer, make it realer. We are doing (cycling-link:"competitive","collaborative") journalling, here. Encourage each other, it's part of the game. (link-reveal:"Funny story:")+(t8n:"blur")+(t8n-delay:1s)[== when I first made a dark alt, I added one of my most wholesome mutuals. I wanted to see what he wrote on his dark alt. the first thing i saw him tweet was the filthiest thing I’ve ever seen somebody put on Twitter. To date. It would have raised eyebrows as a comment under a Pornhub video. It was so horny, unfiltered, and poured from the heart, it was like a shot of everclear on the timeline. (link-reveal:"Now,")[== every time I write a dark alt tweet, i think "wait... (t8n:"fade")+(t8n-delay:3s)[==(link-reveal: 'is this too much?"')+(t8n:"fade")[== then I think… “still not as raunchy as that one post tho”. and i post it. Enable your friends. Let them think… “well, my mutual posted some really vulnerable shit, so i can post mine too! Thanks mutual!” Light the path to truth with the torch of your depravity. Dancefloors also work this way.

''Identification'' It can be surprisingly hard to determine who's behind a dark alt. If they have an easy name then it's [[easy|naming]]. Sometimes, it’ll require a little more digging. Here are ways: * Check their bio * Check their location. * DM them and ask, if you can. * Neat trick: search twitter for their handle. Often you’ll find a tweet like “I’ve made a new locked dark alt at `<handle>`, I hope I find my friends!” * When all is lost, tweet on your dark alt asking if anybody knows who they are. Somebody might already know.

if you intuitively know someone's going to throw off your vibe, say no. (link-reveal:"You don't owe anybody shit. You hear me?")[ (untrue. we live in a society. we do owe each other basic decencies. Them reading your journal is not one of those.)] But it might be somebody you like but you still hesitate. maybe it's because - they might judge you - they might not be vulnerable as you - [[they might not be playing the same game|What if they’re not playing the same game?]] So just DM them. I’m dead serious. Clear this all up in a hurry. Here’s a [[DM template for you to use. |DM Template - Follow Request vetting]]

## DM Template: Follow Request vetting Hi my friend, i hope you’re doing well. I think you sent my dark alt a follow request from <their_handle>. Thanks for reaching out. I want to be clear before I accept it: I use that account to post truly $adjectives things. (here’s a guide that gives context on how I run my dark alt: $url). The honesty level is high, the intimacy level is comparable to that of skinnydipping with me, or reading my journal. If you feel comfortable with that, and if your account is more-or-less for the same thing, give me a thumbs-up and I’ll accept your request. If not, that’s totally okay. There are good reasons to not be at 100% disclosure with everyone all the time! -- editor's note: //i realise this sounds like a strangulated HR rep trying to propose an official threesome, run it over with a truck a few times until it sounds like you//

# What to post in your bio ## norms Tell everyone your dark timeline norms in your bio / pinned tweet. Tell everyone how you want to engage. could be (link-reveal:"simple")[: “here is where i scare the hoes”], or (link-reveal:"in-depth")[: “i have no filter on this account, please call me on my bullshit but be aware that it might be load-bearing bullshit. if you ever leak what you see here i'll catfish your dad”] It’s also valid to (link:"ask people to go easy")[say: “hey. don’t reply except to tell me i’m right and my feelings are right. I don’t want to hear criticism here. it’s the one place i have.”] I have “you can scroll through all my dark tweets, it’s not weird, just click Like on them” in my bio. Because that’s the first thing I do to people's dark alts. And i always feel weird about it. So I thought i’d let everyone know they can do it to me. (link-reveal:"But I’m not weird.")[(link-reveal:" They’re weird.") [ ...i should just ask.]] ## policies I also recommend that you post your follow policy like “mutuals only” or “locked alts only”. my friend's bio says “sometimes i get anxious and remove all my followers, feel free to re-request if that happens”. That's helpful.

# What if they’re not playing the same game? What if their locked alt is very low truth level, with no skin in the game? Asymmetrical vulnerability? What if you’re out here posting your lewds, your love life, your foreskin preferences, and you discover their only post on dark alt is from 3 years ago and it’s: “planned a secret birthday cake for the wife. Nobody tell her... Hehe.” Vulnerability hangover. What if they’re appalled by your posts? What if they judge you? What if they get tired of you complaining about the same bullshit you’re always on? You’re going to be feeling the weight of their eyes on you when you post. That’s [[no bueno|who to think of when you post]].

Who should you think of when you post? (link-reveal:"Yourself duh!")[= (but also, think of your most supportive friends, and remember that they’ve posted [[worse|encouraging each other]] on their dark alts, so really this is nothing.) When you post on main, you post for (link-reveal:"everybody in your circle")[==, (link-reveal:"plus the 550k people who might see it if it goes viral")[==, (link-reveal:"plus the silent lurkers who are always there")[==, plus the (link-reveal:"high school kids who are learning how to be adults by reading your tweets.🔗")[(open-url:"https://x.com/Prigoose/status/1692183227400650906")] But on dark alt you post for you, and for other dark alts. Don't try to impress anybody. [[This is another reason not to let your crush follow you.|altzone]].

# Post ideas - what’s a far less charitable way to address an issue you typically address with nuance and generosity? Get petty. - Who’s a person you don’t like? Vent. Be unfair. Private quote tweet them. - What’s something you wish to consume that you should not? Describe the yearning for it. - How horny are you? Be creative in answering. Be dummy stupid about it. Be colourful. Be specific. - Have you ever tasted your own bodily fluids? what you think? - Whose body would you want to see after they die? - Who would you want to see your body after you die? - What's a group of people you shouldn't be attracted to, but you are? - How would you most effectively shatter the image that people have of you? What would you say that would achieve this? Replace "people" with "your friends", "your parents", "your partner". - are you secretly snobby about something? now is the time and place to say it.

(text-rotate-z:359)[😎 🧠 👈 any space can be high vulnerability if you don't give a shit. 😎 🧠 👈 (if you give a shit, though, then you should probably post highly vulnerable stuff in a place where people are being nonjudgmental, and also posting highly vulnerable stuff.)]

# Inviting people to follow you This is a normal and good thing to do with a dark alt. I think everything should have a little more ceremony. Weddings, breakups, anal, starting a dark alt. Think of it as inviting them to your housewarming party. Just DM people and tell them "hey I started a dark alt". Here's a [[DM template|DM Template - Invitation to Follow]] if you want it fancier. (link-reveal:"If that feels too cringey,")[ just wait for them to [[discover|how to discover dark alts]] you. (t8n-delay:2s)+(transition:"fade")[You know, like waiting for your crush to message you and tell you about $possessivePronoun feelings for you.] (t8n-delay:8s)+(transition:"fade")[Coward.]]

# DM Template: Invitation to follow Hello, friend/crush. hope you’re doing well. I have started a dark alt at <dark_alt_handle>. I will use it to post truly $adjectives things. I’m accepting follows from dark alts. I think we’re cool enough for you to follow me there from your dark alt. If you don’t have one, start one! (link:"Here’s a guide.🔗")[(open-url:$url)] See you on the dark timeline! --- Editor's note: //Feel free to zhuzh this up: * Link a (link:"theme song🔗")[(open-url:"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMyAEP0zCJw")] for your dark alt. * Make a wedding-invitation-style card on (link-reveal:"Canva🔗")[(open-url:"http://canva.com")]. (it’s free and quick), with this text on it. * Tell them why you specifically want them to follow your dark alt (they’re funny, kind, you want to see what they write on their dark alt, you have a [[crush|altzone]] on them, they have a crush on you and you want to feed it). //

# The end Hey, thanks for reading any amount of this. It's a lot and you don't need to worry about having read it all. I hope you start a dark alt immediately and i hope it’s fruitful. (link:'DM me🔗')[(open-url:"https://www.x.com/bashu_thanks")] and let me know if this was helpful, please. Or if there’s anything you’d suggest I change. (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:10s)[==Also, dm $objectivePronoun and tell $objectivePronoun you like $objectivePronoun. Life is actually short, yearning is overrated, you could have a good time together.

# Keeping the Dark Timeline Dark ## Don't leak [[Reason 1 it's dark|why is the timeline dark?]] is because conversations are private. Keep it dark: don't leak alt posts to others. Here is how leaks happen, in reverse order of heinosity: 0) (link-reveal:"Dark-to-light leaking")[: Posting text or screenshots from dark timeline to light timeline. hella uncool to ever do this, even censored, unless you got permission from the OP directly.] 1) (link-reveal:"Screenshot leaking")[: Amy is on her alt, she screenshots something that Bob said on alt, and replies to him with it. This happens surprisingly often by accident bc you don't think about it. E.g. Bob posts a lewd, Amy screenshot it and add sonic the hedgehog into it, post it in reply to Bob, everybody laugh, except now Bob's lewd (feat sonic) is visible to all Amy's followers. opes] 2) (link-reveal:"Copy-paste leaking")[: Bob copy-pastes part of Amy's tweet into his reply. now anybody who reads Bob's Replies tab can see what Amy said verbatim] 3) (link-reveal:"Paraphrase leaking")[==: If I follow Amy, on mobile app I can see Amy is replying to Bob. I can't see Bob's posts. All I see is the [[Conversation with A Ghost]]. But if Amy says "Wow bob, you're telling me you smoked meth with Jonah Hill at Vibecamp in Cabin Zero? I love the dark timeline, don't worry, i'll never tell!" well, now I can infer the content of Bob's posts. So (link-reveal:"don't do that")[==. But also don't (link-reveal:"overthink it.")[== But don't underthink it either.

# Conversation with A Ghost Conversation with a Ghost is when you can only see one half of a conversation bc they're talking with a locked alt you don't follow. It's kinda neat. They'll be laughing at jokes you can't hear, riffing on mysterious themes. If you really want to find out, use mobile app. There, you can see the handle of the person they're talking to, and send them a follow request. On desktop it will remain a sweet mystery. Other names for this: * seance * dark-matter conversation This is one of the easiest places for [[leaks]] to happen.

# Why is the timeline dark? Reason 1: It's dark as in dark matter. there are locked-alt conversations happening all around you, forming a timeline that is intersecting with and passing through your timeline. (link-reveal:'Fascinating!')+(t8n:'dissolve')[ maybe they're talking about you right now one inch from your ear and you can't tell] Reason 2: It's dark as in, shadow. Hidden from the light. [[Dark alts]] are not just locked alts. [[Scrolling the dark timeline]] is very different from scrolling the light timeline. Reason 2.5: because you let the [[right people follow you|Who should you let follow you]]

If the light timeline is a brightly lit city street where you can stroll down and see everybody's market wares arranged to appeal to the passerby, then scrollin the dark timeline is like walking the back alley at night, and seeing into everybody's bedroom windows. (t8n:'dissolve')+(t8n-delay:8s)[==It can get pretty raw and there's a lot of guts and pain but it's got a certain jenny sequoia

## DM Template: Removing a follower Hi <blank>. This is to let you know I am removing you from my locked alt. It is nothing you've done, I just want fewer people/mostly people i have met IRL/people who post more. I have enjoyed our exchanges and wish you well. -- (editor's note: //if this feels too cringe to send, then... either don't add so many people that you ever need to use this, or realise that [[cringe]] is the point). I've sent this multiple times and people are often appreciative.//

There are a few ways to discover dark alts: 1. Investigate [[ghost conversations|Conversation with A Ghost]] that look interesting 2. Look through the followers/following list of another Dark Alt 3. Post "who got a dark alt tho" on main and see who dms you. This can be awkward, bc you then may have to respond to DMs with "Hello! I have no interest in learning more about you. I can imagine a rawer unfiltered version of you and it holds no appeal for me". [[Here's a DM template you can use for that|||DM Template - how to refuse an invitation to follow somebody's alt]] Anyways. Once you found them. Then you can decide [[whether to follow|who you should follow]].

# Who you should follow Following somebody on dark tl is a much different proposition than following somebody on main follow people who will inspire you to post, and keep your dark timeline a [[high vulnerability space]]. also since they'll probably be your mutuals, apply the same criteria as "[[Who should you let follow you]]"

# DM Template: Refusing to follow somebody's dark alt "Hello! I have no interest in learning more about you. I can imagine a rawer unfiltered version of you and it holds no appeal for me" ''Just kidding! I don't have a DM template because I would rather fake my own death than tell somebody this. just don't say anything i guess!''

# Who is entitled to follow you? (seq-link:"Nobody.", "The same people who are entitled to your body", "The same people who are entitled to read your diary", "The same people who are entitled to tell you what they think about you", "Nobody.")

# DM Templates Here are some templates for DMs you might want to send. [[DM Template - Follow Request vetting]] [[DM Template - sending a follow request]] [[DM Template - Invitation to Follow]] [[DM template - follower removal]] [[DM Template - how to refuse an invitation to follow somebody's alt]] [[DM Template - How to refuse a Follow Request]] If these feel too cringe to do, [[click here|cringe]]

# Why make a dark alt? ''Reasons'' (link-replace:"Venting")[''Venting'' venting is (link-reveal:"sacred.")+(t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:3s)[ It has always been (link-reveal:"sacred.")+(t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:3s)[ and even if it weren’t, it's necessary.]] we are living through a dwindling of spaces to vent. Private parlours, teahouse couches, and bar tables have all been transposed to the public square. (link-reveal:"This is a little funny, and a lot bad.🔗")[(open-url:"https://x.com/bashu_thanks/status/1652297341980876802")] ] (link-replace:"Smaller")[''Smaller'' It’s a lot [[smaller|How many followers]]. that’s really nice. ] (link-replace:"Octopus in a Hot Tub")[ ''Octopus in a Hot Tub'' You don’t get the (link-reveal:"octopus effect🔗")[(open-url:"https://x.com/bashu_thanks/status/1692284717616267684")] nearly as much on the dark timeline. It still will happen but at least you know it’s fellow dark alts. The dark timeline is truly a private place. The hot tub is no longer connected to the ocean.] actually here's a [[funny story]].

#A Funny Story when I was about 17, I had a (link-reveal:"paper journal.")+(t8n:"fade")+(t8n-time:1s) [== one day I was writing in my journal. The girl next to me was making art. She pointed at my journal and said (link-reveal:"\"What's that?\"")+(t8n:"fade")+(t8n-time:1s)[== I said “that’s my journal. I write all my private thoughts in there.” She said (link-reveal:"\"cool. can i read it?\”")+(t8n:"fade")+(t8n-time:1s)[== I said “okay” before I could think too much about it, (link-reveal:'and pushed it over to her')+(t8n:"fade")+(t8n-delay:2s)[== She sat quietly next to me and read it for about an hour, occasionally looking at me curiously. I read a book or painted a picture, i don’t remember. I remember sweating a lot, wondering what part she was at. After she read the whole thing she gave it back to me, looked me in the eye, said "thank you", and we became (link-reveal:"best friends.")[== Not really haha! (t8n:"fade")+(t8n-delay:2s)[== Just good friends. (t8n:"fade")+(t8n-delay:4s)[== If you thought this wasn't totally insane, you might like the dark timeline. A dark alt is a form of journal. Dark timeline is, therefore, (cycling-link:"collaborative","competitive") journalling. It can enable incredible things.

# Being Petty //"I want to research the question of When and How to be Mean (the answer is not never)" // - (link-reveal:"`not_a_hot_girl`🔗")[(open-url:"https://x.com/not_a_hot_girl")]

# How to Follow People Click "follow" and it'll send a follower request. You can DM them too if you want i guess. Here's a [[DM template|DM Template - sending a follow request]] [[What to do when they accept your follow]]

## DM Template: Sending a follow request Hi <blank>. I want to see your nudes, cringe, or otherwise judgeable content. I promise to be respectful and at least as cringe as you. Maybe I have a crush on you. Who knows haha. unless. haha. send me a follow request back -- (editor's note: i don't know how to make this sound better. it's what it's)

# What to do when somebody lets you follow them Appreciate the trust they have put in you. ⚠️Note: The rest of this advice is very bad. don't take it. (link: "click here to reveal")[== ## Read absolutely every tweet of theirs. I’m serious, why not? Scroll down all the way. I explicitly put a note in [[my bio|bio]] encouraging people to do this. People have let you in on their interiority, they probably know this is a possibility. If you genuinely harbour curiosity about their being, don’t go halfway about it. Read back to their very first tweet. ## Click like on all the ones that you like This is so they know you’re being weird. This will encourage them to be weird. This is probably the worst advice in this entire piece. At least look through the media to see if they’ve ever posted a nude. Click like on the nude, at least. And post a fire emoji. That’s just (link-reveal:"basic respect.")[== This has been bad advice. (t8n-delay:5s)+(t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:3s)[== Except maybe it’s not

# reply guy Reply guy is a floppy phrase; nobody agrees on what it means. definition here is "guy who exclusively responds to your posts, makes it about him, and doesn't post things that inspire others to respond"

# Mermaid Island You're here in a peaceful lagoon. You've dragged your boat up on the sand. [[A path is leading up to the shrine |shrine]] [[turn back to sea|ship in the middle of the sea]] (if: not $ghost)[ There's a (text-colour:#CBA135)[golden glint] at the [[bottom of the lagoon here.|glint at bottom of lagoon]] ](else:)[= There's a dog sitting in your boat, watching you.

It's far, but there's definitely something shiny and metal down there... as you watch, it seems like gold. Your crush doesn't like gold, you know. You wonder if the pirate king knows that. - [[dive to get it]] - [[ignore it|mermaid island]]

# The Shrine You're here in the flagstoned courtyard in front of an ancient stone shrine. Beyond it, the mermaid statue rises above the jungle, her sightless granite eyes fixed on the blue horizon, her lips showing a gentle smile that comprehends nothing. Vines and branches from the jungle have covered almost every inch of the shrine. (if: not $ghost)[ There are voices, murmuring low and indistinctly. - [[listen to the voices]] - [[tell the voices to fuck off]] ] (else:)[== The courtyard here is full of people. They're seated peacefully on the ground or on the stone benches, wearing deep blue robes. Everybody is smiling and looking at you. They are murmuring low encouragements. You hear some notes of sympathy. - [["What's going on?"|listen to the people]] - [[Tell the people to fuck off(go back to the lagoon)|mermaid island]]

well, "kidnapped"... maybe "seduced". it's not clear from $possessivePronoun note. How sure are you that $subjectivePronoun'll be happy to be rescued, on a scale of 1-5? (for: each _confidenceInterval, ...(range:1,5))[ (link-reveal-goto:"_confidenceInterval out of 5", "confidence set")[(set:$confidence to _confidenceInterval)] ]

(set:_continuation to "temp") (if:$confidence is 1)[1 out of 5? Jesus, $epithet. Why are you even going? Let's give up. (set: _continuation to "No")] (else-if:$confidence is 2)[2 out of 5? Seems kind of a long shot, $epithet. There's still time to give up. (set: _continuation to "No")] (else-if:$confidence is 3)[3 out of 5? That's better than even odds. (set: _continuation to "Let's keep going")] (else-if:$confidence is 4)[4 out of 5? You can't give up. You'll never know and you'll always wonder. Keep going. Do it for $objectivePronoun. (set: _continuation to "Let's keep going")] (else-if:$confidence is 5)[5 out of 5?? (link-reveal:"You have a moral imperative to continue, $epithet.")+(t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:3s)[ The pirate's heart may shatter, but (taking a utilitarian perspective) that's a good bargain for two hearts united forever in perfect love. ] (set: _continuation to "There is no turning back. Truth and beauty are on your side.")] [[_continuation|ship in the middle of the sea]] (if: $confidence < 5)[ [[Give up|Start]] ]

# The pirate king's island You are at the enemy's front door, at the base of the hill where his castle sits. Your boat floats here, moored to a well-made little pier with a sign that reads "Guest Parking". There's a little bench and a brass coin-operated telescope. It's the kind of vibe that your crush always said $subjectivePronoun wanted out of a house. You can take the [[path up to the castle.|the castle]] (if:$viewedGrate is true)[ Out of the corner of your eye, you see [[a small grate in the rock]], water flowing gently out.] Your boat is ready to take you [[back to sea.|ship in the middle of the sea]] [[Try the coin-operated telescope.|coin-operated telescope]]

As you climb the stairs in the hot sun, nobody hails you or halts you, and you know that you've been seen from afar. They know your ship's foolish sails. There is a crowd. The pirate king's court gathers on the battlements, watching you climb. At the top of the stairs, you enter a courtyard. The king is seated on a wooden throne. Your crush is off to the side, looking beautiful, looking divided about the situation. $subjectivePronoun clears $possessivePronoun throat. "Hello, $epithet..." $subjectivePronoun say$s shyly. The pirate king laughs roughly and stands. "So. You've sailed over the ocean, you've climbed my steps, and you've come to speak to me in the tongue of blood?" He pulls his sword free of its scabbard. "How worthy do you feel today?" The king levels the blade at you. "Stand and deliver, you who'd seek your fortune." - [[Fight the king|Fight the King]] - [[Beseech your crush]]

Your confidence level is $confidence. You draw your sword and launch yourself towards the pirate king. (if: $worthiness >= 9)+(t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:2s)[ After a brief fight, you have beaten the Pirate King. He slumps to his knees, heart's blood trickling out from his chest. "Take... take good care of $objectivePronoun..." he gasps, and falls over sideways. His crown hits the throneroom floor, rolls to the stairs, and bounces all the way down the steps, through the courtyard, down the hillside, and into the lagoon. [[Your crush speaks.|you defeated him]] ] (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:2s)+(else:)[= He draws his sword and defeats you(if: $worthiness <=3)[ without even looking at you]. You drop to your knees. Your crush's throat tightens and $subjectivePronoun glance$s away. The court jeers at you loudly. - [["Wait, how... how did you defeat me?"|explanation of worthiness]]

You turn your gaze to your crush. "Come home with me. My boat's in the harbour. Let's leave all of this." $subjectivePronoun smile$s awkwardly at you. "It's really nice to see you, $epithet... but the king's actually a wonderful person. I'm sure if things were less tense you'd get along really well. He reminds me of you." It looks like this may not be a "rescue mission" so much as a "win-back mission"? - [[Fuck $objectivePronoun and fuck this (leave).|don't rescue crush]] - [[Win $objectivePronoun back|win back]]

He cleans his sword. "Well you may ask. It's a variable called (text-colour:green)[(text-style:"expand")[worthiness]]. When every player first opens the Dark Timeline Companion, their (text-colour:green)[(text-style:"expand")[worthiness]] is set by random number generation, and from that point there's literally nothing you can do to change your fate. If you don't luck out on the original dice roll, you're doomed. You can't defeat me." - [["That's unfair!"]] - [["Wow. Ain't that just the way. Oh well."|he kills you]]

(set:$score to 0) The pirate king shrugs. "Yeah... i wouldn't design it that way, but. Well! that was fun." He says a couple of words in Latin. Your crush averts $possessivePronoun eyes. [[The pirate runs his blade through your neck, killing you.|Adventure End]]

"Fair point." he concedes. "But whether for good or evil, I have simply described the bones that underlie the natural world. Or rather, the simulation in which we are having this conversation. You wish for it to be different; but if fate had unrolled differently, you might not be here, and neither would my bride-to-be..." He smiles at your crush. - [["Fuck you, pirate!"|he kills you]] - [["But that is of course a cop-out; where a just man has the chance to correct an unjust world, he must. Free will proves itself in the performance thereof. Otherwise man //is// his unjust world."|you convince him]]

The pirate king presses in deeply and draws the blade across his throat. (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-reveal:"Your crush screams his name, but it's too late.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-reveal:"He topples, grinning from two mouths.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-reveal:"Somebody is crying.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-reveal:"Your knees ache, somewhere a thousand years ago and a thousand miles away.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-reveal:"A golden dog watches from the edge of the wailing crowd.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-reveal:"The king's falling, eyes fixed on you, but he never reaches the floor.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-replace:"He's an inch away.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-replace:"He's half an inch away.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-replace:"He's a quarter of an inch away.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)+(link-replace:"He's an eighth of an inch above the floor.")[== (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)[==He smiles, suspended there, full of love, a saint in an illuminated manuscript. (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:2s)[== Your crush kneels at his side. (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-time:4s)[== [[Eight days later]]

The pirate king is stunned. He taps a finger on his jaw thoughtfully. "Of course. But should I be the one to restore balance? And if i did, would it be free will? Or another preordained motion of the cuckoo-clock automaton, treading his tin-riveted path?" He turns to look at your crush. $subjectivePronoun $isAre'nt sure where he's going with this. "Gregor, what are you contemplating?" He is quiet for a while. Then he reaches out and caresses $possessivePronoun cheek. "Nothing to contemplate, sweetness. Was there any other way this could go? A just man encountered an unjust world, the clock struck twelve, and the doors opened." The king turns to you. "Take care of $objectivePronoun, please." He draws his sword and lays it against his throat. - [["I will."|he kills himself]] - [["Wait!"]]

He pauses. The steel, honed to a razor sharpness, has already opened a little nick. A ruby-red drop of blood blooms as he regards you. - [["Do you love her?"]] - [["Let me do it."]]

He is perplexed. "With all my heart I do. But I know that love won unjustly would curse me as well as breathing the fumes of Hades." -[["Let me take your place."|kill yourself]]

(link-reveal:"He laughs.")[== "No. I'm a pirate, after all. My last act will be a robbery of the satisfaction. [[Goodbye, $epithet."|he kills himself]]

(set:$score to 12000) (link-reveal:"You are on a ship, sailing.")[== (link-reveal:"There is nowhere to go.")[== (link-reveal:"Your crush is here, $possessivePronoun eyes fixed on a horizon you cannot see.")[== Three days ago, $subjectivePronoun whispered that $subjectivePronoun loved you. $subjectivePronoun might have been asleep. You (cycling-link:"think", "must believe", "have no way of knowing if") $subjectivePronoun $isAre happy. (t8n:"fade")+(t8n-delay:4s)[== [[You have won.|Adventure End]]

# The End Your score is $score points. (link-reveal:"Restart?")[(restart:)]

(set:$score to 14000) He nods and offers you the sword. "$epithet, no!" your crush screams, now understanding what's going on. You drag the blade across your throat. You blink three times, your lids coming back up slower each time. The last time, you remain in the blackness. [[The End.|Adventure End]]

"$epithet, you... you defeated the Pirate King!" your crush says, breathless. "Is that... a good thing?" you venture. "Yes!" $subjectivePronoun say$s. "I respect physical strength above any other virtue! Take me away with you, or claim his throne as your own! Either way, your skilled violence has won my heart!" - (link-reveal-goto:"\"Haha... me too, crush. Me too.\"","Adventure End")[(set:$score to 10000)] - [["That's a kind of fucked up thing to say."|press your crush on that]]

You swim out until you're just above the (text-colour:#CBA135)[golden glint], then take a deep breath, flip and start swimming straight down. It's 25 feet down. There are big craggy rocks and starfish around, and you're aiming at a place in deep shadow. You're almost there. You're running out of air, but if you are strong and dive a little deeper, you think you could reach out and grab (text-colour:#CBA135)[whatever-it-is] and come up quick. - [[give up|back to the surface]] - [[dive deeper]]

Just before you break the water, (link-reveal:"you see a golden dog sitting on the beach, placidly watching you.")[== As you surface, salt and air stings your eyes, and you squeeze them shut. When you've wiped it away, [[you're in an empty lagoon|mermaid island]].

You plant your feet and listen for a moment to the voices coming from the empty air in this ancient shrine. The words aren't clear, but the tones are remarkable and varied. Some of them are solemnly intoning in prayer-like drones, others are jabbering with the hitch of nervous energy. Then, gradually, all of the voices clearly unite to say one word. (link-reveal:"\"Stay.\"")[== "stay here. don't chase crushes. don't chase attachments. don't fight. don't die. don't throw your life away for $objectivePronoun. stay here with us. we were all like you. we turned away from the garish dreams of a living heart and found a world stretching out forever in the heart of this shrine. take it. take the plunge. become immortal." (if: $confidence <= 2)[ A single voice speaks, gentle and understanding: "Besides, who knows if $subjectivePronoun even want$s you? Think about it, $epithet." ] - [[stay here forever]] - [[tell the voices to fuck off]]

"Fuck off, voices!" Your shout echoes around the shrine in a blank silence. It's like (link-reveal:"the voices were never there in the first place.")[== You begin to feel a little crazy. - [["This place sucks." (walk back down to the beach)|mermaid island]]

{(set:$score to 20000)} This is it. You stay in the shrine forever, meditating and eating the fruit of the jungle and the water from the spring. You arrive at incredible inner peace and equanimity. Sometimes the fruit of the trees gives you the shits, and the water of the spring tastes like fart. But it's better than yearning. The voices make good company. One of them used to be a storyteller, and you ask him for stories. He's very good. The one injunction that he makes is to never ask him for a love story. And truthfully, you never think to. It's a even-keeled, worn-stone life. Your boat rots in the lagoon, and the rains fade the mermaid's smile year by year. But you never grow older. The price is that you cannot think of your love- think of $objectivePronoun marrying the pirate king, growing older with him, $possessivePronoun bones buried beside his, turning to earth, and all of this may as well be happening to aliens. Your life is hermetic, in the oldest sense. Your energy is channelled, like a river that used to run to the sea. [[But it's better than yearning.|Adventure End]]

You kick down deeper. The (text-colour:#CBA135)[glint] resolves, (link-reveal: "clarifies into a golden necklace...")[==around the neck of a skeleton. To your right, (link-reveal:"two orbs of blue blink.")[== They are the two eyes of a giant (link-reveal:"moray eel.")[== The eel darts from its cave and sinks its hideous teeth deep into your neck. - [[Punch the eel]]

You punch the eel right on its slimy skull. (link-reveal:"It does nothing.")[== (link-reveal:"Thoughts are coming judderingly now.")[= The eel, in hellish silence, heaving its undulating body out of the cave, using its length to wrench you back and forth in long bullwhip (link-reveal:"arcs.")[= The sun overhead, sinking into billowing (link-reveal:"blackness.")[= A spider crab, watching your struggle (link-reveal:" indifferently.")[= Your crush's face, $possessivePronoun eyes growing sad. Then your vision is dark. This is it. - (link-reveal-goto:"Give up", "Adventure End")[(set:$score to 0)] - [[No]]

(set: $ghost to true) The bubbles swirl around you, the sound of the world above grows louder and louder, until it blasts into your ears. Break the surface and gasp for priceless air. Think of the eel watching you from below and immediately strike out to the beach. It's just 20 feet, but it feels like years before you're on the sand. You lay on the sand here a while, panting, silently grateful for your escape. Eventually, you become aware (link-reveal:"you are being watched.")[== You look up. A golden labrador is sitting here, looking at you mournfully. - [["Hi, boy... what are you doing here?"|Talk to it.]]

The dog regards you mournfully, then trots down the sand towards your beached boat and hops in. [[Shake yourself off and follow it|mermaid island]]

As you follow the tunnel upwards, it seems like you can hear $possessivePronoun voice. Your crush. $subjectivePronoun $isAre here! You and the dog slip between another two bars at the other end. You're in a courtyard. You hear $possessivePronoun voice, lilting to $objectivePronoun-self. [[find $objectivePronoun|find crush]]

There's a small grate here set into the rock, and a tunnel leading upwards and into the hill behind it. It looks like a big stormdrain. You could walk into it. Unfortunately, the thick metal bars are too close together for you to enter. (if: $ghost)[== The golden dog turns to look at you, then turns back and slips between the bars. It sits down just inside the tunnel. It looks back over its shoulder, entreatingly. [[It looks like there's a place you could slip through, actually.|tunnel]]

Your crush sings along with you for a few words, then stops, bemused and fascinated. "Who's singing with me?" $subjectivePronoun turn$s around and scans the courtyard, then looks at you, then looks over the wall. - [["Me!"]]

One of them speaks to you. He's a friendly man with a shaved head. "You're dead, $epithet." - [["That's not true."]] - [[Accept your death]]

(set:$score to 50) You haunt $objectivePronoun forever. Some days, $subjectivePronoun wake$s up and plead$s with you to leave. Some days $subjectivePronoun pretend$s not to see you. The king can tell, though he can't sense your presence like $subjectivePronoun can. At times your attention wanders and you see flashes of other lives that might have been. The feel of the tiller under your hand. A shrine. But they are imaginary now, and you see them now from a distance. You're like a digger in a trench, scraping his pick back and forth over the same rut, deepening the walls over his head. The sky over his head narrows and narrows until it's a tiny slot of blue, far away. One day $subjectivePronoun $isAre gone, and not even the sky remains. You wander this earth, singing of a love that feeds on itself, and [[maybe never was|Adventure End]].

The pirate king is bemused by your answer. "Unfair? I would contend that weighting against insubordination is natural and supports a more stable world. Society suffers disproportionately when kings are defeated by jealous suitors. I provide law and order to my subjects, and as a pillar of stability, generate societal wealth for all." - [["Turnover is necessary for good government. Anyways, an appeal to nature just mires us in local maxima. Willingness to defy the order of nature is a driving attribute of modern humans and has led us to civilisational peaks."|good point]] - [["Fuck you, pirate!"|he kills you]]

# DM Template: Refusing a follow request Hi! I don't want you to read my journal. Have a good day! --- //Editor's note: This really isn't necessary. Just click Decline.//

# What are dark alts? Dark alts aren't just locked alts. A locked alt is simply not visible to the public. A dark alt is a locked alt that posts dark.

# Altzone //(pronounced like "calzone")// This is when you can't date somebody, because they've seen your dark alt. (link-reveal:"Q: Haha why would that be a problem?")[== A: You tell me. (live:2s)[== It's true that some partners are fine with their partner reading their diary. If you're one of those people, go for it. But where are you going to crushpost? Or cringepost? Or hornypost? Better save yourself the [[headache|who to think of when you post]].

//"That's not true."// His face, pained but gentle, creases in a frown. "I'm so sorry. I know you have no precedent for this. Nobody ever does. But it's happening. Please accept it. You can't go back to the land of the living." - [[Accept your death]] - [[Refuse to accept it. Go haunt your crush forever|Haunt your crush forever]]

You accept that you're dead. //"Now what?"// He turns slowly in a circle, raising his hands to the congregation in the courtyard. They are watching you with incredible compassion upon their faces. "Join us in peaceful contemplation of the beauty of the universe beyond romantic love. We are here to develop the equanimity that we denied ourselves when crushes narrowed the lens of our consciousness to a tiny pinprick. We are here to witness the world being reborn every moment." - [[Join them as a ghost monk]] - Fuck it, [[Haunt your crush forever]] anyways

{(set:$score to 25000)} You stay in the shrine forever, meditating, accepting new travellers into your ranks every now and then. It's a life empty of excitement, but it's better than yearning. The voices make good company. One of them used to be a storyteller, and you ask him for stories. He's very good. The one injunction that he makes is to never ask him for a love story. And truthfully, you never think to. It's a even-keeled, worn-stone life. And it's better than yearning. Your boat rots in the lagoon, and the rains fade the mermaid's smile year by year. The sun sets and rises and sets again, as your timeframe dissolves into infinity, you find yourself in a single moment where a cloud drifts through the sky and it briefly looks like your crush's face. You'll never see $objectivePronoun again. You've traded that experience for the universe. [[Because it's better than yearning.|Adventure End]]

You speak, but your crush still seems confused. $subjectivePronoun peer$s around. $subjectivePronoun turn$s around and look$s at you. Then $subjectivePronoun look$s away, shrug$s, and keep$s singing. The dog raises its snout to you and speaks, but $subjectivePronoun can't seem to hear it either. Only you can. "Do you see?" - [["No."|The dog explains]] - [["Yes."|The dog explains]]

"You are (link-replace:"dead, $epithet.\"")[== dead, $epithet. You died and now you can choose to let go. Or hold onto something you won't ever touch. Not really. Not ever again." Your crush finishes singing behind him and is gazing out at the setting sun. - [[Tell the dog that he's crazy.]] - [[Accept what the dog is saying.|options]]

He tilts his head and looks at you. "I'm not here to force you to a decision. Inaction remains open to you. I'm the one who gives you the options." - [["What are my options?"|options]]

"Your options are just like I said." The dog turns to watch the setting sun as well. "You can go quietly into [[the light]]. Or you can (link-replace:"fight it.\"")[== fight it. Drag it out. The living will not understand. The most they'll know is that something's here that shouldn't be. Watching them. Yearning to touch them. You'll grow bitter. Certain that if you only howl your pain enough, you'll reach them. You'll clutch and grasp. And it'll only be harder to leave. Remember that. It will never be easier to leave than right now." (link-reveal:"The sun sets.")[== Your crush shivers a little, casting a gaze in your direction, then moves towards the doors to go in. - [[Reach out and grab $possessivePronoun shoulder | grab]] - [[Go into the light.|the light]]

The dog indicates a space behind you with its snout. You look over your shoulder. There is a hole in the world, the size of a door. It is filled with a pure rosy glow that doesn't cast light on anything outside it. It's sufficient unto itself. You know that everything within it is the same- inside that light, everything will always be enough. "When you are ready, walk in." - [[Walk in|Go into the light.]] - [[Fuck this]]

(set:$score to 5000) The castle door shuts behind your crush. The last rays of the sun disappear from the sky. The earth is dark. The light glows softly (link-reveal:"and you move into it.")[== (link-reveal:"It admits you with a perfect grace you have never felt in life.")[== Every hard surface of this world has fought your presence since you were born, but this light accepts every unacceptable portion of you. [[The end.|Adventure End]]

Your hand passes through your crush's shoulder. The same way you passed through the bars in the tunnel. The same way you "escaped" from the lagoon. You have a brief flash of the eel, curled around something, teeth slowly masticating... $subjectivePronoun shudder$s and looks through your face, unseeing, uncomprehending, but terrified. $subjectivePronoun run$s inside and slam$s the door shut. The dog is still looking at the sea. "That's as good as it will get, $epithet. Is this what you want to stay for?" - [["Yes. I'm not going into any light. I'll haunt $objectivePronoun forever."|Haunt your crush forever]] -[["Show me the light."|the light]]

The dog fixes his gaze on you and lets out a soft little whine. "What do you mean?" - [["I'm going to haunt $objectivePronoun forever. $subjectivePronoun'll love me." (turn away)|Haunt your crush forever]] - [["I'm scared."]]

The dog trots up to your leg and lays his head on you, looking up into your eyes. The first doglike thing he's done. You're suddenly aware that he can touch you and you can feel him. "I know. I was scared too." - (link-reveal:"\"You're a ghost dog?\"")[== "Yes. I didn't want to leave my owner. It took a long time to realise that all I was doing by staying was hurting him..." - (link-reveal:"\"I'm sorry.\"")[== "I'm glad. It made me good at this job. I know how hard it is to leave... all this behind. Here. Hold my collar and we'll walk through together." - [[Take his collar and walk through with him|Go into the light.]]

The dog and you trot towards the sound of the singing. Your crush is up on a castle battlement, watching the ocean and singing meanderingly. It's a song $subjectivePronoun taught you once, walking hand-in-hand through the fields of your home country. It's about a love that waits patiently. -[[Join in $possessivePronoun singing, in harmony|harmonise]] -[[Stand and watch $objectivePronoun|stand and watch]]

You and the dog listen to $objectivePronoun, the song's notes echoing out over the sleepy island in the rays of the setting sun. The dog raises its snout to you and speaks, but $subjectivePronoun can't seem to hear it. Only you can. "Do you see?" - [["Yes, I understand."|The dog explains]] - [["No, I don't."|The dog explains]]

Yeah, it's clear $subjectivePronoun $isAre for the piratey streets. Let's go. [[You leave, under the shocked eyes of the king and your crush. |pirate island]]

OK. You can win $objectivePronoun back. [[Let's do this.|Fight the King]]

The telescope is fixed on the castle. A little plaque explains the history of its Gothic Revival-inspired construction. (link-reveal:"You put in a coin and peer through.")[== The castle is undeniably a work of great beauty. You can see your crush, looking out over the battlements of the castle. $subjectivePronoun look$s beautiful in the setting sun. You fall in love all over again. And over $possessivePronoun shoulder, you can see the grate-covered (link-reveal:"mouth of a tunnel.")[== (set:$viewedGrate to true) Wait. You pull your face away. Isn't that identical to the grate you saw just ... [[over there?|pirate island]]

"That's kind of a fucked up thing to say", you state, looking at $objectivePronoun. "Is it? Hahaha!" You peer closely at your crush's face. Somehow, $possessivePronoun smile is not right for the situation. It's... carefully applied, like $subjectivePronoun $isAre desperately trying to smear plaster over a (link-reveal:"hole in the wall.")[== "Nothing means anything, $epithet! Death comes for all of us! You could have given me up for dead! He could have married me and tired of me within a year and killed me..." (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:3s)[== $subjectivePronoun laugh$s again, and this time you hear it's hollow. "Nothing means anything." (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:5s)[== - [["Haha, yea, that's crazy. Let's go home"|Eight days later]] - [[(clasp $possessivePronoun hands) "No. There's a reason I'm here. There is a reason you're here, and I'm holding your perfect hands. ''Everything is excruciatingly meaningful.'' I need you to know that. Everything means something, and I know it's too much. You're allowed to feel it. I'm here. I'll catch you if you fall."|let them shake in your arms]]

You see $possessivePronoun shoulders quiver (link-reveal:"once.")[== (link-reveal:"Twice.")[== Then $subjectivePronoun $isAre falling into you, weeping, falling apart, (link-reveal:"and you're holding $objectivePronoun,")[== and all that you can do is be a rock $subjectivePronoun can cling to while the waves pull $objectivePronoun (link-reveal:"first one way")[==, then another. And that's all $subjectivePronoun need$s. (link-reveal:"To hold you.")[== As you hold $objectivePronoun, $possessivePronoun sobs slow down, and get further apart. finally $subjectivePronoun shudder$s one final time and is quiet. (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:3s)[== "Let's go home." $subjectivePronoun mumble$s into your shoulder. (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:5s)[== - (link-reveal-goto:"Take $objectivePronoun home","Adventure End")[(set:$score to 100000)]

Remember to check your Follower Requests tab. It’s hidden away by default, behind the “More” button on desktop. When you see a request [[identify who they are]], then decide if you want them to see your dark alt. If yes, approve their request (and follow them back! Remember the [[ideal f/f ratio| perfect ratio]] on a dark alt is `1:1` .) only accept follows from [[locked alts|Locked alts only]]. If someone requests you from their main account, tell them to start a dark alt. Send them this guide.

{ (set: $adjectives to 'cringe / horny / uncharitable / petty / depressed / horny / rude / yearning / moaning / venting / horny / nude / lewd / crushy / silly / vulnerable') (set:$url to 'https://bashu.neocities.org/dark-timeline-companion/') (set:$ghost to false) (set:$worthiness to (random: 1,10)) (set: $confidence to 3) (set: $viewedGrate to false) }

(set: $epithet to 'debugger') (if: $possessivePronoun is 0)[ (set:$possessivePronoun to 'debughis', $subjectivePronoun to 'debughe', $objectivePronoun to 'debughim', $isAre to 'debugis', $s to "sss") ]

(link-reveal:"No.")[= (link-reveal:"There has to be more to this.")[= With one mighty heave, you push your body up towards blue skies far overhead... and the eel, impossibly, releases you. It might be following you, but probably not. You don't stop to look. [[You kick back to the surface]]

(link-reveal:"If you've posted things on dark alt, about a specific person, and they'd be unhappy to read those posts...")[== good! that's the point of having a dark alt. (link-reveal:"However, and this is important:")[== ''If that person follows your dark alt, they're going to read the posts and be unhappy.'' So when they request to follow your dark alt, think about that. (link-reveal:"Suggested etiquette when somebody has requested to follow your dark alt and you've posted about them:")[== - Delete the posts before letting them follow you. - If you don't want to do that, at least warn them "Hey I've tweeted some not-nice things about you." Then, they can choose not to follow you. If they still want to follow you, then that's on them. They'll finally know what you think of them. Maybe that's net good.

<img src="images/dark-aparts-3.png"> [[The Start]]